Lone Survivor: The Director's Cut (Playstation 3, PS Vita)
Having just wrapped my first playthrough of the PS Vita version, I am scared. Of this game. I urge horror fans, who have one of the game systems, to experience it. It's weird being a lone white guy in a strange world, with a grin on my face, popping a pill to fall asleep and having strange dreams, but enough about me. Let's talk about the eerily similar game. The real things that make this 2D, indie, survival-horror game scary are the amazing sound-effects and the fact that the protagonist of the game is clearly insane from the get-go.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Friday, August 16, 2013
Yup, the worst idea for a blog post ever is making a blog post about the worst idea for a blog post ever. So here it is: HORROR: THE OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO a.k.a. if all your favorite horror icons made one terrific, terrible song (promoting movies they're plugging, of course). Oh god, I've seriously posted this? I feel naked right now. I feel like the white guy in the 90s band All 4 One, photobombing my black neighbors.
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Your friendly neighborhood creeper here with a post regarding 2000s horror movies. I'm fixated on the last decade because it was a landmark period in horror. My last list about the 2000s dealt with overrated horror films, so I'm much more excited to talk about these. Without much further ado, here are some thoughtful thoughts about some overlooked masterpieces of the genre. I know I'm leaving out some great stuff, which is why this is only a first post. I still haven't seen some that are considered new classics like Enter the Void. And don't worry, I'll get to Calvaire, when I do my POS list.
Five Across the Eyes (2006)
So many insightful comments were hurled at this one and they went something like this: "Worst! Movie! Ever!" I guess I wouldn't expect the IMDB crowd to offer much more, but it's quite telling that so many people took the time to be so vocal about a movie that most will never see. It begins with a van full of high school girls on a dark stretch of road while on a trip. The movie has a fantastic sense of atmosphere, taking place completely within their van. Literally every shot of the movie is from within the van, which gives it an extremely tense and claustrophobic current throughout. Check it out if you haven't and give it another chance if you are an idiot who hated it. I know, I know, it looks like it was filmed on an iPhone. Big fucking deal; it's great and keeps you, like its characters, constantly on edge. The whole thing is currently on Youtube:
One of Miike's most torturous films that's just as unrelenting as its subject. It's the story of real life 19th century samurai Izo Okada. He was one of the most feared assassins in the history of Japan and we get to see why in this journey through his afterlife. The movie is like a stream of consciousness trip through Izo's unconsciousness that forces him to come face-to-face with never-ending demonic forces. He realizes he's met most of them before as he slices and dices his way into the next life. For all its blood and gore, Izo is a highly philosophical and spiritual karmic tale. Although I shouldn't be surprised. After all, it's a Japanese story about Japan's history of violence that weaves its spirit through time and space.
Monday, April 8, 2013
If there ever was an event worthy of a blog post, it's the death of Jess Franco. His cheapo films were always thought of as trash except near the end. In the end he is recognized as one of cinema's most prolific badasses because he always did exactly what he wanted.
He had his share of detractors, including yours truly, but ultimately left a huge impression. Congrats Jesus, you outlasted the bastards. See you at the big Drive-In in the sky.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
The false scare.
4. "You're all gonna die."
3. "What the fuck was that!?"
2. "What do you want from me!?"
Oh, you don't wanna know.
And lastly, we can always tell when this one is coming:
1. "This isn't funny you guys!"