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Monday, July 2, 2012

The Squeeze (1977) Review

Here's a rather obscure exploitation flick that's surprisingly not bad at all. It stars 70s bad movie staple, I mean B-movie staple Stacy Keach. He's got a girl's name, hehehe. It also stars Carol White. Don't worry, she's not also a dude. The movie is basically a hostage caper where the mother of Keach's children is kidnapped.
These British blokes kidnap the hot mama and her daughter Hagatha. Or Lila, I mean. Nevermind I can't remember the name. But the mom is Jill and she's in deep trouble if her rich husband and her ex-husband, detective Stacy Keach, don't save her soon. We're shown that these gangsters are really ruthless guys despite their dapper appearances. Luckily Keach is a private investigator. The only problem is he's also an ill drunk in need of desperate help. Will he and Jill's husband be able to keep the mobsters from taking Jill's life and possibly her dignity as a woman? It doesn't look good as Keach spirals deeper into alcoholism.
To make matters worse, the head mobster begins to notice how attractive Jill is. For the moment though, he keeps his eye on the prize. The prize is the money he's trying to extort from the rich husband. The criminals also have a history with Keach's ex-cop character, but they don't even know he's Jill's ex. What a small world. Small world indeed; wherever I turn I come face to weathered-face with Stacy Keach.
I told you. There he is in an instructional video trying to teach you to habla espanol. But back to the good part, the bloody gangsters.
Eventually they get bored and instead of, say, brushing their teeth, they have some fun with Jill. Even though her retarded-looking daughter is right in the next room. Nasty boys.
The head mob guy decides to force Jill to strip for them. The movie then indulges in a fetish of a scene that caters to my number 1 favorite kind of exploitation scene. Jill is indeed forced to get naked and dance for the creepers. She might be under duress but they're more interested in what's under dat dress. She looks damn great doing it in this rather lengthy scene. It lingers and director Michael Apted succeeds at making it enjoyable.
The evil guy then takes her to bed. Jill is at her lowest point as Stacy Keach reaches much closer to finding her and the guys making the deal with her husband. There are several bumps in the road of course, mostly caused by Keach. Or rather his character. Unless they got him drunk and just let the cameras roll.
At the conclusion, the criminals put pantyhose on their heads and rob a vehicle full of money that the husband brings to them. They don't let Jill go because she knows what they look like. I won't spoil it for you because the conclusion is pretty great and tension-filled.
Overall: I'd give it a 3 out of 5 as a movie and a 5 out of 5 as exploitation. It catered to my every disgusting need.


  1. I'd like to see a review of that instructional Keach video.

  2. He's not as great of an instructor as you might think. I know it's shocking. For some reason Chapter 1 of the video is a good introduction and all the other parts are the teaching of cuss words. I want my money back from this "pinche puto."