Tuesday, October 24, 2017
The Autopsy of Jane Doe is a movie with a lot of promise. The first half of the movie is quite compelling and atmospheric. ALERT: SPOILERS. If you don't want it spoiled for you, you should, because it sucks. These are the reasons why:
Monday, October 31, 2016
I can't promise it's great, but a new horror movie is premiering on JoBlo's Youtube channel and it stars the cute chick from Contracted, which is on Netflix. From Nov. 3 - 13, Wolf Mother will be available to stream on the Youtube channel. Check out the trailer below.
Monday, August 1, 2016
Sunday, June 19, 2016
Let me preface by saying, these scenes are the sole reason I am Mr. Xploit. If not for these 10 scenes, I could've had class, I could've been somebody, instead of a bum. Naaah, I'm pretty awesome. Who else could bring you such a definitive list? Let me know if there are any essentials I forgot.
10) Head of the Family (1996): Jacqueline Lovell
9) Dear God No! (2011): Madeline Brumby
8) Grave Danger (2009): Debbie Kopacz
The highlight of any Jim Haggerty film is the writing and cinematography. BAHAHAHAHA! When you're done laughing, you may recall this scene where Debbie is forced by an unknown caller to take everything off. While not exactly in shape, Debbie does benefit from a certain doe-eyed cuteness and a scene that comes well into the flick.
7) The Hornet's Sting and the Hell It's Caused (2014): Joni Durian
6) The Pit and the Pendulum (1991): Rona De Ricci
5) Chloe (1996): Marion Cotillard
4) Strip Search (2004): Maggie Gyllenhaal
3) The Squeeze (1977): Carol White
2) Stealing Candy (2003): Jenya Lano
Making a Xena: Warrior Princess guest-star strip in softcore porn is like stealing candy from a blind baby. But the especially gorgeous Jenya Lano is a true find. Upon first viewing, you'll wonder where she's been all your life. Then you'll IMDB her and find out. The answer is other crap starring other Baldwin brothers. But in Stealing Candy she plays a never-nude movie star that's kidnapped and forced to have sex online before her adoring fans. Both frightening and alluring at the same time. This movie changed me as a pubescent boy. For the better? You be the judge.
1) Lost Highway (1997): Patricia Arquette
Wednesday, May 18, 2016
That's right, filthy slobs, it's National Charlie Spradling Day in the lower 48 states; you know, the ones that don't suck. Charlie was the black-haired babe with the smokey voice from the Full Moon movies To Sleep with a Vampire, Meridian: Kiss of the Beast, Puppet Master II and Bad Channels.
Watch Charlie fuck up the Full Moon Video Zone segment:
Watch the trailer for 1993's To Sleep with a Vampire
And finally, watch her being interviewed, from Bad Channels
Monday, April 18, 2016
Some Kind of Hate (2015)
The Babadook (2014)
The Babadook (2014)
Sunday, September 20, 2015
I've been thinking about the future of horror lately because of the mainstream-ification of the genre with TV like American Horror Story, Scream Queens, Scream and the continuing parade of remakes.
1) We'll finally get the Suspiria remake and it'll indeed be disappointing.
2) There will be a Ginger Snaps TV series that'll actually be received well by fans.
3) A true Hellraiser remake will continue to linger in a hellworld limbo.
4) More Texas Chainsaw Massacre remakes/sequels will roll out as horror fans roll their eyes.
5) Following Wes Craven's death, Robert Englund will "go postal" and get arrested for consecutive DUIs.
6) John Carpenter will kick the bucket wearing his trademark "who gives a fuck" sweatsuit.
7) Masters of Horror will be resurrected in some form. I can dream, can't I?
8) Eric Stanze will continue to make terrible movies following his 1999 masterpiece Ice from the Sun.
9) Jennifer Rubin and Tuesday Knight will collaborate on a get-rich-quick scheme and end up badmouthing each other to bored bloggers.
10) Blogger 'Mr. Xploit' will untie the noose from his neck and not jump from his chair, when it's announced that both Emily Perkins gets the lead in an erotic horror epic and Russell Brand is elected president of the US of A.